Punny Story

From: Hera Jones

Sent: Monday July 11, 2011, 8:34AM

To: _EVERYONE

Subject: PUNNY STORY!!!!

 

This is your Monday humor . . . enjoy!

Punny story!

Please join me in remembering a great icon of the entertainment
community. The Pillsbury Doughboy died yesterday of a yeast infection
and trauma complications from repeated pokes in the belly.. He was 71.

Doughboy was buried in a lightly greased coffin. Dozens of celebrities
turned out to pay their respects, including Mrs. Butterworth, Hungry
Jack, the California Raisins, Betty Crocker, the Hostess Twinkies, and
Captain Crunch. The grave site was piled high with flours.

Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy and lovingly described Doughboy as a
man who never knew how much he was kneaded. Doughboy rose quickly in
show business, but his later life was filled with turnovers. He was not
considered a very smart cookie, wasting much of his dough on half-baked
schemes. Despite being a little flaky at times, he still was a crusty
old man and was considered a positive roll model for millions.

Doughboy is survived by his wife Play Dough, three children: John
Dough, Jane Dough and Dosey Dough, plus they had one in the oven. He is
also survived by his elderly father, Pop Tart.

The funeral was held at 3:50 for about 20 minutes.

If this made you smile for even a brief second, please rise to the
occasion and take time to pass it on and share that smile with someone
else who may be having a crumby day and kneads a lift

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Rage E-mail

From: Tasha Gordon
Sent: Monday, June 20, 2011 10:34 AM
To: _EVERYONE
Subject: Stop messing with my desk!!!!!!

I don’t know WHO it is but SOMEONE keeps putting STUPID FACES all over my desk. PLEASE STOP!!!!! Im already harased by you people enough for NO GOOD REASON and here you are TRYING TO GET ME EVEN MORE ANGRY

ARGH

Tasha Gordon
Case Manager

 

From: Aaron Simon
Sent: Monday, June 20, 2011 10:35 AM
To: Tasha Gordon
Subject: RE: Stop messing with my desk!!!!!!

Aaron Simon
Enrollment Guy, Loki Impersonator, Troll
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The Package

From:                         Siobhan Connor
Sent:                        Thursday, June 16, 2011 8:00AM
To:                        _EVERYONE
Subject:            Puzzled

Someone left a small box with brown wrapping paper tied up with twine and a printed notecard with “for Siobhan” on it.

If you did this, please let me know. Ha ha. It is very funny.

Come to my office. Now. And we’ll have a chat.

 

 

Siobhan Connor

Fiscal Administrative Specialist

No animals were harmed in the sending of this message—unless you forward it along without the express, written, and recorded permission of the sender of the message—however, a great number of electronics were greatly inconvenienced. (This makes sense because we are running a bunch of dinosaur machines without the basic ability to process e-mails with attachments without slowing them down.)

From:              Aaron Simon
Sent:               Thursday, June 16, 2011 8:01AM
To:                   Siobhan Connor
Subject:            RE: Puzzled

Did you complete the project? I’m interested in knowing.

Best,

Aaron Simon
Loki Impersonator, Anonymous Representative

From:              Aaron Simon
Sent:               Monday, June 21, 2011 8:43 AM
To:                   Siobhan Connor
Subject:            RE: RE: Puzzled

I can’t help but notice that you never responded, Siobhan.

That’s not the best etiquette.

Did you complete the project? It’s of the utmost importance.

Best,

Aaron Simon
Loki Impersonator, Anonymous Representative

This e-mail has not been scanned for viruses in any way. You probably have dozens of pieces of malware on your machine now.

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