New post up at Bullet Reviews, this one’s on American Psycho.
Have a read. Have a think. Yadda yadda.
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Shameless Self Promotion
Though I’m sure the recent upsurge in hits is an anomaly and will shortly be rectified, with my daily pageviews hovering comfortably around two or three, it would be profoundly stupid not to leap upon this opportunity for self-promotion like Gene Simmons.
See, I do other things than lurk around here and post bullshit that a few people read and, surprisingly, don’t hit me with hate mail for one reason or another. (Although I’d welcome it; hate mail is hilarious.)
For instance: I run another blog that’s periodically updated. It’s a long-winded version of my year in England, and, about a year and a half after starting it, I’m not halfway done with it.
For another instance: I review stuff that’s distracting me.
For another instance: I deluge a friend with comic scripts. Sometimes he draws them. Regardless, he does great work, and his style is kinda like punk show posters, which is pretty friggen cool.
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One Does Not Simply Walk Into Mordor
Pic unrelated
First of all, I’d like to thank the Gondor Academy for extending its invitation for me to speak at this, ah, gathering of the minds. Is that the correct term for a quasi-militaristic endeavour? Perhaps; for does not every military action require a substantial amount of forethought if it is to succeed? But I digress: All of you are aware of the purpose of this Conference of Interested Peoples. The purpose, of course, is for a preemptive attack on the nation of Mordor, and the ease with which that may be undertaken. As I am aware, the leaders of this Conference have certain intelligence in their possession of a ways to the end we all seek. By which I mean, the destruction of the Dark Lord, Sauron.
For those of you who are unaware of my credentials, I am a scholar of such things, and have been since the age of twelve when a party of Orcs raided my home and village, not two hours’ travel from here. I have spent my years learning of the History and Religion of the Dark Lord and his creations and minions, and have, by doing so, established myself as the foremost scholar on Mordor Studies. [chuckles] Despite that, the highest number students to enrol in my courses have been three. I guess I’m just a bit dull.
[audience gently laughs]
Right, levity aside, my conclusion, summarised in a snappy, easy-to-remember slogan to be printed upon pamphlets and distributed to troops, is simple: One does not simply walk into Mordor.
Aaron C Simon 