The Aaron Simon Guide to Life

It’s been a while since I’ve had anything to post on here. Sorry for that. I guess. (I haven’t checked my stats in a while, so God only knows if anyone loads the site on days when I don’t post anything. [And no, man, I’m not going to, like, check that shit. I got stuff to do.])

Anyway, it hit me this morning as I was walking out of the restroom that people really need me to tell them how to live their lives. I mean, come on. I graduated Phi Beta Kappa, am a published author (yay), and have been to other countries. You don’t get much cooler than me.

So with that in mind, I thought about it and realized that I have two pieces of advice for people:

  1. Be as Dudelike as you can
  2. If you’re playing Pyro, friggen airblast people when they’re on fire

He cares, deep down inside.

Then I realized that would make for a shitty blog post, so I decided that I’d come up with some stuff that actually mirrors the rare occasions that I have a fully coherent thought. (FACT: It’s taken me six days to write this many words.)

So I did what came naturally and decided to base things off of my family. Names omitted because, well, yeah.
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